TRAPPED WITHIN..

My love, my drug,flows through my blood.

"Is there a way out?" I cry to God above.

They say I will overcome this one day, but it's hard when my own mind doesn't feel the same way.

I don't strive to feel good, just to feel numb, because no feelings at all are better than some.

In search of a way out of my dark days, I stumbled upon something that took the pain away.

It was love at first sight, the perfect escape, unaware of the consequences I would soon pay.

Relationships, jobs, opportunities quickly fade, with the only thing left being the mess I had made.

Now my new "normal" is dysfunction and sin,desperate for what would make most people cringe.

Straws up my nose or a needle in my vein became the only way to get through the day.

I never meant to hurt those who love me most, but the decisions i became forced to make were no longer my own.

The perfect solution I thought I had found, became the ugly addiction holding me down.

Hope for a better way becomes bleaker everyday when what's ruining my life is all that I crave.

A temporary relief of my pain,guilt and shame, became a permanent struggle I face everyday.

Will I ever have the courage and strength to end this lifestyle for happier days?

All one can do is hope and pray....